Monday, 22 December 2008

C'est la vie

Geez life is ... a minefield.

Sometimes you'll be walking around minding your own beezwax when BAM your foot will get blown off by a mine and other times you'll be walking around and no mines will be goin' off. And you'll be all like 'what the? I thought this was supossed to be a minefield? Where are all the mines? I wish I'd step on one right now', just for a few moments of entertainment... and then I guess horror would be the next to follow.

Take from this analogy what you will.

And then sometimes life is ... a flower-pot and you're the seedling.

You know what you have to do.. (well eventually you have a faint idea of what you should do, that is after all the ideas in your head stop walking into walls and well quite frankly each other) ... but all you can do is wait, wait for the sun for the rain and the 'will'. That fucking 'will'. And you 'will' sooo hard, thinking eventually if I 'will' enough I will get what I deserve. I will get my comupins (but in a positive sense).. but alas sometimes 'will' isn't enough.

(And sometimes overwilling could result in a trip to the doctor and who wants to open that can of worms?)

The major player here that I have failed to mention is time. Seriously, it's the one thing that an impatient person can't control. Damn that time factor.

So what does that mean, you have to play the waiting-game and see what happens? Well, that sucks. Cause while you're waiting other people have fun assuming things that are totally incorrect.

Today my mum told me I had a middle-class mind. Totally mis-judging that as a compliment, I asked what this so called middle-class mind entailed. She said my head was in the clouds and I thought things were just going to fall into my lap.

Sometimes I think her head is the clouds.

Sometimes, it's always nicer to secretly wish your head was in the clouds, kinda like Paris Hilton and Jessica Simpson, only their heads aren't really in the clouds, it's a complete and utter ploy. That Hilton sex video was soo calculated. She knew exaclty what she was doing.

Why do you think she kept looking directly at the camera and winking? Huh?

Anyway, back to the point. Ignorance is bliss and I am more than ready for my fair share.

Tuesday, 16 December 2008

Where the Bloody Hell Are ya?

God stunts like this make it sooo hard to be patriotic.

So Nick and Hugh are doin' the rounds. Promoting like they've.... promoted so many times before. To the right is Hugh chaneling well what looks like his Boy from Oz days. Why? I'm not really sure. It's not like we don't already doubt his heterosexuality.

Then to the left of him is our good 'ol Nicky, doing what us Aussies do best. That's right you guessed it, upsetting the Aboriginies. Now the last thing I want to do is disrespect anyone. So I'll let Nick do the rest.

The Kid blowin her own on German show Wetten das...?

Baz obviously didn't give these kids a lesson in Aboriginal traditions cause apparently women are forbidden to play the suspect instrument and if they do, well they become infertile!

Shiz! Lucky Nick's already popped out a couple and adopted a couple more! Clever girls obviously thought ahead.

Australia tells the story of an English aristocrat, played by Kidman, who travels to Australia where she falls in love with the country, a man and a young Aboriginal boy.

And I haven't seen it, soley due to the fact that is looks well like Australia Tourism ran out of ideas and rounded up the troops for a little Aussie Aussie Aussie OI OI OI.

Pity the troops weren't educated before hand.

Booo have a cry.

Let me see if I can pencil you in.


Cyclic Defrost End of Year Party and Mag Launch

@ Horse Bazaar
397 Little Lonsdale St, Melbourne

Purposely different?



Andy Uprock is a c**k

So Andy Uprock, the founder of Cuprocking, the chimp that belongs to Mooks, has decided to get all deep and meaningful. You know, like from the heart and shit.

So his newest cuprocking venture is called Poetry in Braile.

Check his ludicrous speech here:

Yea like I'm a vigilante and I totally kiss Mooks' a-hole.

His official Mooks blog:

Andy Uprock


The title was just too easy. sorry.

Tuesday, 9 December 2008

Melbourne Gallery Hopping




What are you looking at?

My photo
I am more than prone to monologues; however, this is solely due to the manner in which they compliment a witty anecdote and their ability to resemble concrete evidence when it is so obviously lacking. I often wish I could emulate that aloof character who coolly stands in the corner smiling mysteriously as if she has a secret. However, I fear resisting the temptation to involve myself in other people’s conflicts and responding through body language rather than verbose banter may come across as contrived and arrogant. And, I am not willing to take that chance.

Ye Faithful